With the Army at the SCG

January 9, 2007 by Sid The Hat

You may imagine from my frighteningly accurate portrait here, that I would be more suited to a place on a 1950s football terrace than a seat with England's famed travelling contingent - and its true an aversion to St George's cross attire, Hackett t-shirts and blistering skin meant fitting in with them was a fairly daunting prospect.

Still I swapped the trademark trilby for a wide brim hat and took my place in the crowd under the baking Sydney skies for the Third Day, only to witness England again submit meekly from a seemingly promising position. The failures of the team have been exhaustively documented, so I thought I'd turn my attention to their famed supporters - and look at how they might up their game.

In an earlier blog, The Third Umpire said he felt the Barmy Army did not get behind the side when it mattered. I would strongly disagree with him on this point.

True in the morning they do not chip up with much but I think a month of hangovers gives them a pass in this respect. And its certainly to their credit that when Shane Warne was on the brink of a 50 they picked up their noise to drown out the buzz from the home crowd.

My problem with the Army contrarily is their unquestioning devotion to the team.

When I left for Australia, I wondered whether there would be football chants like 'Fletcher Out' or even 'You're not fit to wear the shirt'. Both seem applicable but are forbidden in the creed of the 'We are the army' song which defines themselves as the "loyalist cricket supporters the world has ever known".

I realise the culture of the army was set during England's hapless era in the mid-90s but just like the ECB they need to adapt because I dont think they're serving the current team well with this attitude.

From enjoying a family holiday, to luxury travel and accommodation and ego pampering behind the scenes the England players should at least feel a burden to perform for those who have spent so much money to follow them, but instead they are mollycoddled like cute African orphans by Hollywood A-listers.

You might say given the 5-0 result its a good job that England's most prominent followers enjoy themselves regardless of the team's efforts, but its difficult to think of another prominent team sport where incompetence is
accepted without recourse from supporters.

Are the Barmy Army not angry at the pathetic performances in the Series? Watching England's 2005 success for me now is like watching Seinfeld after Michael Richards' racist outburst (is Kramer's lolloping stride not a little too close to Basil Fawlty's Hitler impression for comfort now?) and I'm surprised they are not furious their greatest sporting moment now seems as sullied as my favourite sitcom.

This isn't to say I did not enjoy the day with the Barmy ones. From Living on a Prayer to the Neighbours tune, the trumpet player is imaginative and could do with passing on his songbook to the dire England football team's brass band whose idea of rousing crowds is to play the Great Escape when 2-0 up against Liechtenstein.

There were some good japes as well. I particularly liked appealing for every Andy Symonds delivery, after he wanted KP out lbw for a ball edging just wide of third slip (though dear old Greigy thought it was close on first glance on Channel Nine!).

Also the lack of incidents caused by such a large travelling support, probably less than two Aussie Rules teams managed in Ireland a couple of months ago, is to their credit.

The Barmy Army were born when England fielded a team without many Test quality players nor great media profile and being there was the event itself, as there was little expectation of victory.

Now they follow a very well-paid team who mostly possess the ability to play Test cricket, their demands of the players should shift accordingly.

Is the Barmy Army part of England's problems or their only shining light? [email protected]

More Blog Entries