So what...

What stood out from the days gone by was my traumatic headache that plagued me for quite a many days. The kinds that made a mess of my work and left me disabled for almost 45 minutes, every freaking day. A kind hearted colleague offered me some pills he uses to treat his migraine.. voila!! My head has been ok today. Hope it stays that way.

Had an overseas telecon for a Sr. Management role. Clearing the initial rounds I was quite geared up, only to be put in my place by the CEO. So I got to listen to some unsolicited advice about how age matters and other shit. I wanted to ask him why the hell was he wasting my time then. I wanted to give him the details of my past, but something stopped me from further pursuing the cause. And the 'gyan' from some people when I told them about the prospect- why are you doing this. why did you come to India if you are still eager to go back, you lost your mind, some more blah blah blah.... Hope they're all happy. I couldn't really care either ways.

I notice that the kind of enthusiasm and zeal I had towards work is fading. The person who was once teeming with ideas and experimenting with new approaches thriving on the obstacles now just does the work that needs to be done and nothing beyond that. Not to be mistaken for a slacker, I can sense the extra dose of adrenaline missing. Just get the work done and get out is the buzzword.

I'm reminded of this post.. and I see that i'm not the same person anymore.

At times when I look around, I notice the world whizzing by me. I see people evolve so much, there's always progress, if not in their professional lives then atleast in their personal lives.... I on the other hand either seem to be stuck in time or even worse, walking back.

What's missing is that inner self that takes over me whenever I fall short or need that extra push. I can only hear myself say, big deal.. so what?

I'm either getting old too fast or perhaps i'm just tempting fate to give me a hard kick on the backside to get me back into my elements. Whatever!! I wish for that kick in the butt more than anything else.