Oh, And One More Thing...
by hilzoy
A friend of mine asked me to post the following:
"I guess Andrew Sullivan is just on a roll this week. After essentially erasing transgendered persons from existence by saying that all minorities are now protected against employment discrimination, Sullivan now has taken it upon himself to explain why it is that we transsexuals aren't really part of the LBG community, borrowing this lovely quote from someone named Rex Wockner:
I've been sitting here sort of picking my own brain and asking myself if gay and trans people do in fact have some crucial thing in common. I've read tons of opinion pieces and blog posts on the ENDA war in recent weeks, but none of them really opened my eyes. What do I have in common with a guy who wants to remove his willy, grow breasts, become a woman and get married to a man? From where did this relatively new concept of "the LGBT community" come?This may be a mystery to gays who tend to still appear generally masculine, but to any effeminate gay man or butch lesbian, the parallels are quite real. Gender expression falls into many categories, and for anyone whose methods don't fit neatly into the male-female dichotomy, they can expect a lot of social intolerance. Of course, all gays face varying degrees of intolerance, but transgendered persons and non-gender normative gays face very similar issues, and both will still face employment discrimination if the current version of ENDA is passed into law.
It would be nice to think that, since both the GLB and TG communities face a great deal of intolerance from society, we might do a better job of understanding one another. But prejudice is a strong force, and just because you've been subjected to it doesn't mean you can't apply it just as well. Transwomen like me get to deal with issues like not being eligible for treatment at some rape crisis centers because we're not 'real women.' Gays like Andrew and Rex think we're just weirdoes who want to get our genitals snipped. And plenty of heterosexuals think we're just trying to find a way to sneak into the ladies room.
Maybe I don't have much in common with the Andrew Sullivans of the world. I certainly can't speak to what his experiences may have been. But I can't help but wonder if the kind of hell that I have gone through wondering what is wrong with me because I never felt like a man despite my body isn't in many ways similar to the struggles gays go through as they wonder why they don't feel attracted to the opposite sex. And I think it's a shame Sullivan has never even considered that possibility."
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OK, this is hilzoy again. Following Sullivan's link to the clueless Rex Wockner, I find this quote:
"In the end, Barney and I and HRC and NGLTF and Lambda Legal and the rest don't really have a lot of power to make sure more congressmen and women become more familiar with transgender people. It is up to transgender people themselves."
Is it really? Why? Most of us who are not transgendered are, after all, adults and free citizens. We presumably do not need to wait for other people to educate us. We can do that for ourselves, and we should. Especially in this case. As I said earlier, transgendered people have enough on their plate as it is. We can take up the slack, and we should. If that requires actually trying to understand why someone might want to undergo gender reassignment, then making that effort would be worth it.
Likewise, why does John Aravosis write things like this?
"I support transgendered rights. But I'm not naive. If there are still lingering questions in the gay community about gender identity 10 years after our leaders embraced the T -- and there are -- then imagine how conflicted straight members of Congress are when asked to pass a civil rights bill for a woman who used to be a man. We're not talking right and wrong here, we're talking political reality."
If, as he claims, Aravosis does support transgender rights, then why just describe this political reality with regret, rather than trying to change it? Why not use his very public platform to try to inform his readers? Why not exercise some actual leadership?
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* Note: the fact that both of the people I cited are openly gay does not mean that I think gays, lesbians, and bisexuals have a special obligation to do this educating. I don't think anything of the kind -- I'm straight, and I'm trying to do my bit. It's just that Aravosis and Wockner, like Sulivan, are people whose posts have made me think: why all this public bafflement, rather than an attempt to inform and persuade, or to fix the problem they're bemoaning? I imagine it's no accident that all three are members of the LGBT community; or that most straight bloggers haven't written on this at all. I'm not too happy about that one either.
Also: for what it's worth, there are still a couple of unclaimed copies of She's Not There, which I described here. Send me your address (which I will not use for any other purpose), and I'll send you one.
Andrew Sullivan: drop me a line. One copy has your name on it. :)
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